Healing Together: A Cornerstone Approach to Couples Therapy for Trauma, Infidelity, Addiction, and Inner Child Wounds
“It’s more than just communication problems sometimes. ”
Couples don’t usually seek therapy just because they fight about dishes or date nights. They come because something deeper is happening—something that words alone can’t fix. Whether it’s the betrayal of infidelity, the emotional distance created by dissociative-type behaviors (addiction, working, over-consuming), or the invisible wounds of childhood trauma, these patterns often leave couples feeling stuck, exhausted, and hopeless.
As a Licensed Clinical Social Worker with over 21 years (yikes, that flew by) of experience in mental health, addiction, and relationship issues, I specialize in couples therapy, helping couples heal the root causes of disconnection in order to anecdote it. My private practice is based in San Diego, CA, where I offer in-office or walk-and-talk sessions and telehealth services available across California and Pennsylvania. I work with couples who are ready to do deep emotional work to transform their pain into connection, which is actually a ton of MEANINGFUL WORK!
Who I Primarily Work With as A Couples Therapist
As a compassionate couples therapist, I primarily work alongside those touched by:
Couples recovering from infidelity or betrayal trauma (emotional, physical, familial, sexual, financial, social)
Couples navigating substance use or behavioral addictions, or dependencies within their family system
High-achieving partners dealing with burnout and emotional disconnection, often leading to relationship instability
Adults who grew up with emotionally unavailable, critical, or chaotic caregivers and are now healing through inner child work
Partners caught in cycles of codependency, anxious-avoidant dynamics, or emotional shutdown
These couples are often high-functioning in many areas of life. But their relationship has become the place where unhealed wounds play out. They don’t just want to stay together—they want to feel safe, seen, and secure together.
My Approach is simple and effective: Relational, Trauma-Informed, Evidence-Based Protocols, and Heart-Centered, Full of Compassion
I draw from a rich blend of clinical training and lived wisdom to meet couples where they are. My approach includes:
Gottman Method Couples Therapy (GMC)
For improving communication, trust-building, and emotional attunement on a sound, safe house foundation of trust, commitment, love maps, admiration, and fondness
EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing)
To address past trauma and reduce reactivity in relationships
DBT (Dialectical Behavioral Therapy)
To support emotional regulation, distress tolerance, and mindfulness
Inner Child Work and Codependency Recovery
To help partners recognize unmet attachment needs and shift dysfunctional patterns
Nonviolent Communication (NVC)
To build empathy, clarity, and connection in high-conflict or emotionally avoidant relationships
Couples Therapy for Trauma
Unresolved trauma often becomes the silent third partner in a relationship. Often unconscious, and causes havoc. Trauma may show up as:
Emotional shutdown or withdrawal (Stonewalling)
Heightened reactivity or defensiveness (Defensiveness & Criticism)
Difficulty trusting or letting your partner in (Contempt)
In couples therapy, we work together to identify these trauma responses, reframe them with compassion and understanding, and build emotional safety again. Using EMDR and attachment-focused tools, I help couples understand their triggers and co-regulate in moments of distress if we get stuck in a somatic trauma cycle.
Couples Therapy for Infidelity
Betrayal wounds the very foundation of trust and intimacy, which is the cornerstone of the relationship, or the walls. But healing is possible. My work with couples after infidelity focuses on:
Slowing down reactivity and rebuilding emotional safety
Processing grief, shame, anger, and confusion in a guided, supported space where no one is exposed to toxic shame
Rebuilding commitment through transparency, honesty, and healthy boundaries
Infidelity doesn’t have to be the end of a relationship. Sometimes, it becomes the beginning of a deeper, more honest connection.
Couples Therapy for Addiction
Whether you or your partner is struggling with substance use, compulsive behaviors, or emotional numbing, addiction affects both people in the relationship. In our work together, we explore:
The emotional impact of addiction on both partners
Codependent dynamics and enabling behaviors
Rebuilding trust, accountability, and long-term recovery support
Couples therapy can be a crucial pillar in sustained recovery. Helping both partners reclaim intimacy and integrity which restores faith and hope in the relationship.
Couples Therapy for Inner Child Healing
Many couples don’t realize they’re arguing from the wounded parts of themselves formed in childhood, maybe morphing after prior romantic relationship traumas. If one or both partners grew up feeling unseen, unsafe, or emotionally responsible for others, those patterns often surface in adult relationships exponentially. Through deeper awareness of inner child work and attachment-based interventions, I help couples:
Identify old emotional blueprints and unmet needs in order to meet those needs
Develop new ways to respond to yourself and your partner with compassion in the moment to reduce reactivity
Create a relationship that offers the emotional safety you both desire and need to feel seen, heard, and considered
Couples Therapy for Codependency
Codependency often masquerades as love, care, or loyalty. But it leads to burnout, resentment, and emotional enmeshment, often resulting in one or both being unwell. I have found this often in codependent relationships. Where the control and caregiving are making individuals sick. My work with codependent couples focuses on:
Understanding the origins of over-functioning of caregiving qualities and people-pleasing
Establishing what the purpose of healthy boundaries and emotional differentiation allowing more closeness
Rebuilding the connection based on mutual respect and autonomy, now that the false beliefs have been explored more compassionately
Begin Your Healing Journey Today!
If you and your partner are ready to heal the root causes of disconnection, I invite you to begin this work with me. You don’t have to carry the weight of trauma, betrayal, or unmet childhood needs alone. With compassionate, evidence-based support in couples therapy, you can build the kind of relationship your nervous system can finally rest in.
Located in San Diego, CA. Offering in-person and telehealth therapy for residents of California and Pennsylvania.
Rebuild Trust, Heal Wounds, and Deepen Connection with Couples Therapy in San Diego, CA
If you're feeling stuck in patterns of trauma, betrayal, addiction, or emotional disconnection, you're not alone—and it doesn't have to stay this way. Through compassionate and evidence-based support at Amy Anderson Therapy, you and your partner can begin the healing process together. Reach out today to take the first step toward meaningful change with couples therapy in San Diego, CA. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if couples therapy is right for you
Begin meeting with compassionate couples therapist, Amy Anderson
Start deepening your connection with your partner!
ADDITIONAL SERVICES OFFERED AT AMY ANDERSON THERAPY
Located in San Diego, CA, Amy Anderson Therapy provides trauma-informed, heart-centered care for couples and individuals ready to heal at the root. I specialize in couples therapy for challenges like trauma, addiction, infidelity, inner child wounds, and emotional disconnection, as well as individual support for anxiety, neurodivergence, infertility, betrayal trauma, and relational burnout. My practice is affirming and inclusive, with experience serving polyamorous relationships, non-traditional families, and professionals in demanding roles—including military, healthcare, and first responders. For clients seeking a different setting, I offer walk-and-talk therapy, and for those exploring deeper healing, I provide psychedelic-assisted therapy (PAT) in a safe, grounded environment. You can also visit my blog for resources and reflections on emotional wellness, connection, and relational healing.
