How Couples Therapy Helps Marginalized Populations Find Equal Control and Caregiving in their Relationships
In every relationship, partners are navigating the balance of power, caregiving, and emotional labor. For couples from marginalized populations—whether due to race, gender, sexual orientation, immigration status, disability, or socioeconomic inequities—the challenge is even greater. Research shows that systemic barriers and historical trauma can shape how partners give and receive care, leading to patterns of imbalance, misunderstanding, or burnout in romantic relationships.
This is where couples therapy becomes more than a place to talk about the real values, discrepancies, privileges, and communication—it becomes a safe space to challenge oppression, heal intergenerational wounds, and create a more equitable partnership.
In this blog, I’ll explore how couples therapy in San Diego, CA helps marginalized partners redistribute caregiving and control, why it matters for long-term relationship health, and what evidence-based practices are most effective.
Why Marginalized Populations Experience Unequal Relationship Roles
Couples from marginalized backgrounds often carry the weight of systemic inequities into their relationships. Research highlights several challenges:
Power imbalances shaped by culture and oppression: Studies in the Journal of Marriage and Family show that partners from marginalized groups often face external pressures that reinforce rigid gender, cultural, or caregiving roles.
Economic and social stressors: Poverty, discrimination at work, or limited access to healthcare often mean one partner becomes the default caregiver or decision-maker.
Internalized oppression: Partners may unconsciously replicate societal messages—like the belief that one person “should” have more control or carry emotional labor.
Minority stress: LGBTQ+ couples in particular face chronic stressors (e.g., stigma, discrimination) that intensify dynamics of who protects, who provides, and who sacrifices.
When left unchecked, these patterns can create resentment, codependency, or emotional disconnection.
How Couples Therapy Levels the Playing Field
Evidence-based couples therapy approaches—like Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), the Gottman Method, and Culturally Responsive Therapy—directly address these inequities. Therapists help partners recognize systemic influences while also teaching them tools to share caregiving and decision-making responsibilities more fairly.
Here’s how:
1. Identifying Invisible Labor
Many marginalized partners take on hidden caregiving roles—emotional support, scheduling, childcare, advocacy—without acknowledgment. Research from the American Psychological Association (APA) shows that when couples name and validate invisible labor, both partners feel more respected and equal.
In therapy, partners learn to track caregiving contributions beyond finances, helping each partner see the full scope of what the other provides.
2. Redistributing Caregiving Responsibilities
Therapy encourages partners to ask:
Who gets to rest?
Who makes decisions about finances or family care?
Who supports the other when stress is overwhelming?
Through structured interventions, couples can negotiate a fairer division of caregiving tasks. The Gottman Method emphasizes "shared meaning"—creating rituals and agreements where both partners feel they are contributing in ways that reflect their values.
3. Challenging Power Imbalances
EFT and culturally responsive therapy teach couples how to name the power dynamics influenced by race, gender, or immigration history. For example, a partner may unconsciously dominate decision-making because of traditional cultural expectations. Therapy provides a safe place to question these norms without shame.
A 2021 study in the Journal of Marital and Family Therapy found that when therapists acknowledged systemic oppression in the room, marginalized couples were more likely to achieve balanced emotional and relational power.
4. Strengthening Emotional Safety
For marginalized couples, safety is often compromised by discrimination or trauma. Couples therapy creates a container where both partners can explore vulnerability without fear of judgment. EFT research highlights that when couples feel safe, they are more likely to express unmet needs, renegotiate caregiving roles, and build healthier control dynamics.
5. Building Relational Resilience
Couples therapy teaches marginalized partners not only to share power at home but also to advocate together in the outside world. Whether navigating healthcare systems, workplace discrimination, or extended family expectations, therapy helps couples become a united team.
This resilience aligns with research in the Family Process Journal, which shows that equitable caregiving and decision-making directly predict relationship satisfaction and long-term stability.
The Couples Therapist’s Role in Equity and Empowerment
Couples therapists working with marginalized populations use a trauma-informed and culturally humble lens. This means:
Naming systemic oppression instead of pretending relationships exist in a vacuum.
Validating intersectional identities—how race, gender, class, and sexuality interact.
Facilitating open dialogue about power, control, and caregiving without blame.
Teaching practical tools for shared decision-making, such as problem-solving frameworks and household responsibility charts.
A trauma-informed couples therapist sees caregiving and control not as personal failings, but as reflections of both systemic inequality and individual attachment histories.
Why Equality in Caregiving Matters for Love
Couples who achieve balance in caregiving and control experience:
More satisfaction: Both partners feel valued and respected.
Reduced burnout: Neither partner carries the full emotional or logistical load.
Deeper intimacy: When power struggles ease, connection grows.
Greater resilience: Equitable couples face external discrimination and stress with more strength.
As marginalized couples learn to restructure roles, they are not just improving their relationship—they are rewriting intergenerational patterns of inequality.
Amy’s Final Thoughts
Couples therapy is more than conflict resolution. For marginalized populations, it’s a path to healing historical wounds, balancing power, and redistributing caregiving in ways that reflect justice and love. By combining evidence-based interventions with cultural humility, couples therapy empowers partners to co-create relationships where both voices matter, both needs count, and both hearts are cared for.
If you and your partner feel weighed down by unequal caregiving or power struggles, know that couples therapy at Amy Anderson Therapy can help you rewrite the story—one that honors your resilience and builds a foundation of equality.
Healing Power and Redistributed Care for Equity in Relationships Through Couples Therapy in San Diego, CA
If you and your partner are ready to challenge imbalance and build a more equitable connection, couples therapy in San Diego, CA can help you find your footing together. Discover how therapy can be a space to heal from systemic pressures and reclaim mutual care in your relationship. Reach out to Amy Anderson Therapy today to begin creating the balanced, empowered partnership you both deserve. Follow these three simple steps to get started:
Schedule a free 15-minute consultation to see if couples therapy is right for you
Begin meeting with supportive couples therapist, Amy Anderson
Start reclaiming mutual care in your relationship.
Additional Services Offered at Amy Anderson Therapy
At Amy Anderson Therapy in San Diego, CA, the same focus on equity, caregiving balance, and emotional healing that supports marginalized couples also guides every service I offer. My trauma-informed approach goes beyond symptom management to help clients heal at the root—whether through couples therapy that integrates Inner Child Work and EMDR for issues like infidelity, trauma, addiction, or emotional disconnection, or through individual therapy for anxiety, neurodivergence, infertility, betrayal trauma, and relational burnout. My practice is inclusive and affirming, serving polyamorous relationships, non-traditional families, and professionals in demanding fields such as military, healthcare, and first responders. For those seeking alternative experiences, I offer walk-and-talk therapy, and for clients pursuing deeper healing, I provide psychedelic-assisted therapy (PAT) in a safe, grounded environment. You can also visit my blog to explore insights on emotional wellness, relational repair, and building equitable, lasting connections.
About the Author
Amy Anderson, LCSW (CA LCSW 66246, PA CW022947), is a trauma-informed therapist dedicated to helping individuals and couples create balance, emotional safety, and authentic connection. Drawing on more than 20 years of clinical experience in residential, hospital, government, and private practice settings, she blends evidence-based modalities such as the Gottman Method, EMDR, CBT, DBT, Internal Family Systems, and Psychedelic-Assisted Psychotherapy to meet clients where they are. At Amy Anderson Therapy in San Diego, CA, she supports clients in healing from relational wounds, integrating past experiences, and building the grounded, fulfilling relationships they deserve.
